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Answers given by 2nd grade school  children to the following  questions: 

Why did God make  mothers? 
1. She's the only one who knows where the  scotch tape  is. 
2. Mostly to clean the  house. 
3. To help us out of there when we were  getting  born.

How did God make  mothers? 
1. He used dirt, just like for the rest  of us. 
2. Magic plus super powers and a lot of  stirring. 
3. God made my mom just the same like he  made me. He just used bigger  parts. 

What ingredients are mothers made  of? 
1. God makes mothers out of clouds and  angel hair and everything nice in the world and one  dab of  mean. 
2. They had to get their start from men's  bones. Then they mostly use string, I  think. 

Why did God give you your mother and not  some other  mom? 
1. We're  related. 
2. God knew she likes me a lot more than  other people's mom like  me. 

What kind of a little girl was your  mom? 
1. My mom has always been my mom and none  of that other  stuff. 
2. I don't know because I wasn't there,  but my guess would be pretty  bossy. 
3. They say she used to be  nice. 

What did mom need to know about dad  before she married  him? 
1. His last  name. 
2. She had to know his background. Like  is he a crook? Does he get drunk on  beer? 
3. Does he make at least $800 a year? Did  he say NO to drugs and YES to  chores? 

Why did your mom marry your  dad? 
1. My dad makes the best spaghetti in the  world. And my mom eats a  lot.. 
2. She got too old to do anything else  with him. 
3. My grandma says that mom didn't have  her thinking cap  on. 

Who's the boss at your  house? 
1. Mom doesn't want to be boss, but she  has to because dad's such a goof  ball. 
2. Mom. You can tell by room inspection.  She sees the stuff under the  bed. 
3. I guess mom is, but only because she  has a lot more to do than  dad. 

What's the difference between moms and  dads? 
1. Moms work at work and work at home and  dads just go to work at  work.. 
2. Moms know how to talk to teachers  without scaring  them. 
3. Dads are taller and stronger, but moms  have all the real power cause that's who you got to  ask if you want to sleep over at your  friends. 
4. Moms have magic, they make you feel  better without  medicine. 

What does your mom do in her spare  time? 
1. Mothers don't do spare  time. 
2. To hear her tell it, she pays bills  all day  long. 

What would it take to make your mom  perfect? 
1. On the inside she's already perfect.  Outside, I think some kind of plastic  surgery. 
2. Diet. You know, her hair. I'd diet,  maybe  blue. 

If you could change one thing about your  mom, what would it  be? 
1. She has this weird thing about me  keeping my room clean. I'd get rid of  that. 
2. I'd make my mom smarter. Then she  would know it was my sister who did it not  me. 
3 I would like for her to get rid of  those invisible eyes on the back of her  head.